Is Tom Brady Dating Emily Ratajkowski?

Everyone is so excited about where Tom Brady is landing the footballs in his pants. They are fascinated with figuring out who owns the goal posts between the legs of where he's dropping his touch downs now that he's retired.

There are terrifying rumors about him landing with Kim Kardashian, which for people with any taste is a horrible thought. We get that she's a billionaire, but she's also fake and horrible and scary looking.

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There are other rumors of him being with Reese Witherspoon, because they live in the same compound in the Bahamas where they tax evade through shell corporations, there's not tax in the Bahamas as you may or may not know. That property is actually the source of the Kardashian connection.

Well, after being at the Michael Rubin celebrity filled FANATICS fourth of July party, people jumped back on the Kim K storyline, since she was there, but the sources are saying he was chatting up another Kanye girl Em Rata the entire time.

I assume Em Rata is the source who released that information, because all press is good press!